We Trust These People With Nukes?

Just to connect to a previous rant, one theme in gun control debates is that the common folk can't be trusted with access to really potent weapons, like RPGs and nuclear bombs. Such deadly weapons must remain only in the hands of the government.

Which contains more morons per cubic foot than the annual convention of people who rode the short bus to school.

This rant isn't about nukes. It's about the stunningly pointless gay marriage amendment, which the House voted on (Thanks to AS for the link!) despite it being rejected by the Senate, which is sort of like turning over the next card in your Magic deck after you've already been reduced to -20 life. (Those of you who are not total nerds, insert some sports analogy here.) Like the guy said in 'Alien', "Game over, man! Game over!" But such common wisdom as "knowing when to quit" is not possessed by those empowered to spend all of our tax dollars on our behalf, since we're too dumb to spend our own money wisely.

To wit, we get such marvelous comments as:

"Marriage is not about love," volunteered Rep. Todd Akin (R-Mo.), who noted his 31 years of matrimony. "It's about a love that can bear children."


Well, that's just peachy-keen! 'Ceptin, of course, 'tain't true nohows. (I am attempting to speak in the native tongue, here. How am I doing?) It is legal to be married if you are sterile. Or menopausal. Or plan to never have children. It is even legal to be married and never engage in sex. (Some would claim this is not only legal, but inevitable. Ba-dum-BUM!)

Of course, no one bothered to call Mr. Akin on this, or ask him if he'd mandate annullments for all marriages where one or both partners cannot conceive. Someone should. But no one with access to the House has the guts to do so.

Of course, if bearing children is the sole issue, there's plenty of ways around this. I might recommend a 'breed and secede' program. Once you have produced a child, you are free to marry whom you wish, your duty of continuing the species (which, we know, is teetering on the very edge of extinction) fulfilled.

It is well worth noting that there are no, nada, none, zip, nil, zero, goose egg, Todd Akin's brain cell count arguments against gay marriage which don't devolve to "The Bi-uh-bull (it's a three syllable word in these parts) says so!" or "It's just plain icky!" Neither is a valid basis for legislation.

But the best "reason" for this vote came from Gingrey, who said, in effect:"We need to show a bunch of neanderthal fundementalist suicide-bombing woman-hating freedom-loathing barbarians that we despise gays just as much as they do!" You know. We need to tell the same people whose ideology we are putatively at war against that, in fact, we're just like them.

So the "strong on defense" Republicans are justifying raping the Constitution (sans lubricant) in order to appease the sort of people that don't need landing gear on their planes, if you etgay my iftdray. This would be a perfect opportunity for the Democrats to reclaim the hawkish ideals they abandoned in the 1960s. They won't, of course. The Democrats are the Chicago Cubs of political parties, skilled only in losing no matter how good the odds.



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  1. Robert Mueller says:

    It's kinda depressing that I'm more aware of the political situation in the US than in my own country, but your guys appear to be much better at pulling stupid crap like this...

    It's a pity that the people who get elected are invariably those who play the system well, which is apparently in direct opposition to their ability (or willingness) to serve the interests of the population at large. (Except for the, ahem, person-equivalent legal entities with their generous cough campaign donations.)


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